I hit it! I hit my wall! Fed up with me just existing and not truly living in my life. To others, it probably didn’t look that way, but only you know the fire burning inside of you. Only you know if you are playing ‘full out’ or if you are ‘holding back’. You and only you know. And . . . I knew!
To be honest, I had known for quite some time. I just kept my dreams, my hopes and my aspirations to myself as though they were locked in a vault. Nobody else knew. Just me. By keeping it that way, I didn’t appear to be falling short at all. It was my secret! Quicksand is what I call it! That’s where it was buried. It’s as though I walked into quicksand and allowed my dreams and aspirations to suffocate. And they did. Fear, negative thinking and misalignment for me is quicksand.
Then my Momzi transitioned and it took the wind out of any sail I did have. I was numb, hurt, grieving just like all of us can be and do after losing a loved one. It was my lowest rock bottom yet. I had lost my Dad a few years back and my seventeen year old dog a year after then. I now have what Brendon Bruchard calls ‘mortality motivation’. Now I know that the clock is ticking. Tomorrow isn’t promised. My loved ones may be gone, but I am still blessed to be here. I want to become ready to earn my blessing for still being here. How about you? While I was down and out, I heard three different nuggets that jumped out at me at different times:
- “More of you needs to show up!” – Tony Robbins
- Strive to become the ‘highest true expression of yourself’ – Oprah
- No matter who you are, all of us have something deep down inside of us that is shouting – “Let me out!” – T D Jakes
Mediocre, that’s who I had allowed myself to become over the years. For me I had been riding the roller coaster of hum drum and numb enough to be okay with it day in and day out and before I know it, it’s Y-E-A-R-S later. Sure, I had a few successes sprinkled in my life here and there. However, year after year consisted of mostly procrastinating regarding almost anything other than work. Of course, my motivation was, I gotta get paid, jobwise, that is. To be brutally honest, I was miserable at my admissions job. I appeared happy, but deep down, I wasn’t. I was doing what I had to do, while neglecting who I was supposed to become. Like I said earlier, only you know the fire burning inside of you. Only you know.
Who wins? Your half-baked self or your best self? By the end of this book, it is my desire that you have decided to soar with your best self also. Re-examine your life. Does it resemble how you imagined your life to be or no? Or did your life take on a personality or a route of its own? Are you nowhere near what you could have imagined? Maybe it’s not your entire life that needs overhauling. Maybe it’s just one area that you would like to improve upon. You know better than anyone else. The ball is in your court.
Excerpt from Absolute Best! Change Your Mind Change Your Life! – Savoi Ragsdale
